Knowing how to get women to go out with you is a learned skill. It may seem that some men have had the talent since birth, but they probably acquired it through trial and error.
You may know men who are particularly handsome and who seem to pick up women with ease. You may assume it’s because of their good looks. A movie star appearance helps, but it doesn’t get you all the way to home plate.
You may also wonder if those books, programs, and seminars on “How to Pick Up Women” work. Most of the ones I’ve seen advertised offer formulas that are unethical and unnecessary. There are a few exceptions, however. I attended a workshop years ago to refine my skills in finding women who were a good match for me called “Dating Mastery.” A doctor of holistic medicine led it. It was phenomenal! Much of what I learned is included in my book, “Finding the One Who’s Right.”
I’ve been considered to be a fairly good-looking guy, especially in my younger years. I’m passed the halfway point now. I’m wiser but not as “cute,” as women say. Okay, here’s the truth. Being good-looking “may” give you the opportunity to sell yourself, if you have the courage to approach women. But it doesn’t help to close the deal. That requires skill, which is acquired through experience.
Good looks are not the strongest attraction factor for women. Confidence and financial security or strong prospects for it are. I’ve known men who are unattractive, overweight, balding, or short but have superior confidence, who get women to go out with them with ease.
If you are shy, don’t have much confidence, or have solid career prospects, I’d suggest that you do what is necessary to improve yourself in these areas first. You know what you need to do to acquire confidence and a career that you feel good about. You also know the vehicle that will get you there: courage! Don’t have any or enough? Do what you’re afraid of and then you get it. Begin today!
Once you make the commitment and start on the path to your goals, it is likely that somewhere along the way you will realize that you have gained enough confidence to start approaching women. At that point, you will begin a new learning process that requires the same vehicle: courage! Eventually, you too will be getting women to go out with you with eeeeezzz. 😉
Here are some tips for newbies and those who are rusty. These inside secrets would have saved me a lot of anxiety and frustration had I known them when I started out and recalled them later when I found myself back in the dating game. Whether you’re a newbie or a man who wants to get back in the game, the rules are the same although your perspective, based on your life experience, will, of course, be different. Here they are.
- Women don’t see themselves as you do. (Our point of view is physical. Theirs is emotional.)
- Women do not have any special powers other than those “you” give to them in your mind.
- Most women, even the most beautiful, have insecurities about certain areas of their appearance or life just as you do.
- Many women who appear to be out of your league are not, as you may discover if you take a chance.
- Many exceptionally beautiful women are not asked out as often as you imagine, if at all.
- Most women are flattered when they are asked for a date if it is done properly.
- Most women want to be asked to go out, if the circumstances, time, and place are appropriate. (Asking a happily married woman out is inappropriate.)
- Most women like a direct approach when being asked out for a date.
- Most women, especially the beautiful ones, are not influenced or impressed by compliments about their beauty, body, or sexy outfit. (Save that for a later date.)
- You’ll likely be surprised by how many women respond favorably to you, whether they agree to go out with you or not.
- When a woman rejects you, it usually has nothing whatsoever to do with you or how you approached them.
- Once you gain some skill and momentum in asking women to go out, you’ll likely find yourself with more dates than you can handle.
- Most women do not expect you to take them out on expensive dates, especially in the beginning. (You should definitely not do this for many reasons).
- Getting to home plate is often more likely than you imagine.
Here are the three keys to getting women to go out with you.
- Your mindset on whether it is possible.
- This can change with the circumstances and your mood. Stay and move forward when it feels right. Move on when it doesn’t.
- Your level of self-confidence.
- This is acquired by achieving personal development goals and through trial and error with women. In developing your skills with women, you are looking for what works for you!
- Your ability to ask women out even if you’re afraid.
- This is gained by going ahead and asking women out even if you’re scared. Then you get the courage.
Everything about getting women to go out with you is easier than you are probably imagining now. I was once a very shy guy. Asking women out was either not a possibility or extremely difficult. Once I developed some confidence, gained some courage, and got past the awkwardness, I was shocked by how easy it is. The same will likely happen to you.
Go do it! Then you get the dates. 🙂