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How to Have Lots Single Friends

The Couple's Review - Non-confrontational Communication
Book by Brad Paul, Solotopia

Many singles struggle with their social life when they are between relationships. This is especially true for singles who want to stay unattached for a while or indefinitely.

They don’t know how to be socially engaged without hanging out with couples. Their weekends and evenings are often spent alone. Singles have a particularly hard time during holidays when they do not have a partner. They would like to be with other singles but they don’t know how to create a group of single friends on their own terms.

They may know about singles clubs and groups in their area. But their focus is almost always about finding a date, a boy/girl friend, or a spouse. They rarely center on creating friendships and special interest groups.

So how do you get lots of singles friends? How do you attract single friends who match your values, interests, and goals? You do it by putting together your own singles groups, activities, and parties. This may be a stretch for you like it was for me at first, but the rewards you get personally and socially can be immense.

Here are some ways to get lots of single friends. Click on the links for how-to information.

  • Build a singles club. I created a singles organization that aligned with my values including a focus on building friendships first! Soon I found myself with hundreds of like-minded single friends. It was an extremely rewarding experience.
  • Start a targeted singles meetup group. Set up a singles meetup group based on a special interest. Pick one that you’re passionate about. Here are some ideas: vegan singles meetup group, fitness singles meetup group, or blogger singles meetup group.
  • Hold singles holiday parties. Holidays can be especially difficult for singles. Holiday events are traditionally meant for couples and families. So what are singles to do? Hold their own, but for singles only! No couples allowed. Whatever the occasion, be it Thanksgiving or Christmas, put together your own event in replace of, alongside, or on the next day.
  • Do a Valentine’s Day event. The day for lovers. Well, how about a day for unattached single romantics? Complete with romantic music, love stories, and a poetic potluck dinner.
  • Organize pyramid singles mixers. With these, you invite single friends who agree to bring at least one single friend with them. Depending on the size of your meeting place, you might limit the number of single friends they can bring to perhaps 1-3. Then design some mixing and introduction activities to get the ball rolling.
  • Conduct a costume party. These are the best parties by far, in my experience. When you’re able to dress up in your fantasy costume and fully or partially hide your identity, fireworks can happen. When in costume, people tend to lose their inhibitions, shed their shyness, and become their own heroes. Wearing a costume can be like drinking five shots of liquor without the nasty side effects. Although Halloween costume parties are customary, a theme-based costume party works anytime.

Having a group of single friends who align with your values and interests can enrich your life tremendously.

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Brad Paul

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